3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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