yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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