I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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