The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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