Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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