TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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