You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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