My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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