Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
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