I wish i was in the wii world.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
