I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
