just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
