Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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