Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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