New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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