someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
