you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
