David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
