Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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