Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
