i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
