census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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