Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
