I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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