i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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