In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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