I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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