everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
