Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
