Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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