She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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