She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
