Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
