What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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