Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
