i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
