My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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