You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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