glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
