John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
