found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
