The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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