What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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