The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
there's paper in my vomit.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
