If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
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