I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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