we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
