Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
