girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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