I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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